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Best in Show, brought to you by Kibbles and Bits.
July 31st, 2008
Welcome sports fans, and animal lovers alike, to the 10th annual Home Town Library Dog Show. We are pleased to be reporting LIVE from the show ring! The crowd and contestants are abuzz with rumors of a rookie in our midst. Get familiar with his name fans, you will be hearing it often in show rings for years to come. He is the strangely named, The Son Huckablog. He is already renowned for his cuteness, and fearless attitude toward all the dogs.
While new, his journey here has not been without trial. He had originally hoped to show the dog, which he also owns, Katydid It Huckablog. Sadly, it was decided without a barrel full of Puppy Ritalin she would be unable to compete because of her, how shall we put this kindly, robust personality. A last minute switch to Sassafras Huckablog, the elderly dog of The Son’s Gigi and Pappaw, is keeping The Son in the competition. Other tribulations have plagued the House of Huckablog, it seems that The Son’s very own Mama, Hey You Huckablog, came down with a case of “so tired, I need a vacation”, just this week. The Rookie again had Gigi and Pappaw come to the rescue. They brought The Son to their lush compound for two days of rigorous training. It is rumored these training exercises included the ever controversial tractor rides and sandbox playing method. I guess we will just have to wait and see how effective all that training was.
Oh, ladies and gentleman, look who has just arrived here on the dog show premises; it is that rookie we were just discussing, The Son! He appears to be wearing a heartachingly adorable plaid overall and is matched by Sassafras (oh note from the owner, she prefers to be called Sassy). Sassy is looking quite winsome, and nowhere near her 77 dog years old. The Son and Sassy go straight to check out this year’s current favorite, the yellow lab, Bonkers. Yes folks, this competition will be fierce.
The rookie and his dog engage in a last minute visualization exercise.
Aw, look at that fans, the pug has handily won the crocodile hunter class. He will be competing against The Son again in that most important of arenas, the cutest dog class.
It is the moment for which we all have been waiting. The Son Huckablog and the geriatric Sassy take to the ring. They are both showing signs of extreme concentration as they begin to circle the ring.
In a unprecedented move, The Son tries to flirt with the judges. Oh, that is a risky move. Will it pay off? Now might be a good time to mention the judges panel is made up entirely of female librarians. Yes, The Son may just know exactly what he is doing.
Here the rookie goes, making his final lap around the show ring.
What a competition. The judges have asked a handful of competitors to line up for a final looksee. The Son brings with him his biggest fan, his Mama. He gives a final wave to the judge’s dais. Sassy seems to be distracted, or is trash-talking the other competitors. One would hope not, that, and rear-end sniffing could get her and The Son disqualified.
Now is the tense time. The competitors go back to their respective pits to await the announcement of the winners. We can see from here that Coach Pappaw Huckablog is mentally tallying other dogs’ scores to see how the Son ranks. Ssssh, here come the announcements. “Attention ladies and gentlemen, we are ready to announce the winners.
The winner of the Cutest Dog class is first-time handler, The Son Huckablog, showing Sassafras. Would you care to make an acceptance speech young man?” “You like me! You really like me!” Oh, listen to that crowd roar!
What a lovely gold cup and blue ribbon. This organization has spared no expense. The Son is making his way over to the winner’s circle to have his first true experience with the dog show paparazzi.
What a day, what a day. The Son and Sassy both look hot and worn out. It is time for a celebratory bowl and sippy cup of champagne, or water, whichever.
There goes an amazing competitor. I can’t wait to see what they bring to the show in years to come.
5 Responses to “Best in Show, brought to you by Kibbles and Bits.”
Dear Sassy,
I owe you an apology. When The Son was a baby I judged you too harshly. He was too rough with you and you snapped at the air in front of him. I was a scared first time mama, and wanted to have you banished to Siberia. I was wrong. You are wonderful with my son, and he loves you and asks for you often, You also could show Katydid more than just one lesson in manners. If it were not for the fact that your hair makes The Husband ill, and that it would be oh so unfair to poor old incontinent Alex, I would invite you back into my living room. Please accept my apologies.
Sincerely,
Hey You
I love Katydid. She just needs a bit more loving. Perhaps puppy prozac. But, really I think she just craves loads of attention…and why shouldn’t she? She’s adorable! Her mother is just a bit too hard on her, and expects her to be something she’s not. I think Katydid is a bit of a tomboy. Her poor parents just don’t get it. She’s so misunderstood.
Oh, congrats to Sassy and TheSon! The pics are precious!
And Hey You…I miss you.
Well, I owe Katy an apology as well. In her youth, she was just too, ummm, “exuberant” (to put it nicely) for the GrandHuckablogs, experienced dog-lovers that we are. She has calmed down somewhat, but she can’t compete with TheSon in the attention-getting department, so I imagine she’s decided to stop trying to steal his spotlight by now. In fact, if it weren’t unfair to her family (who would strongly object anyway, I’m sure), I would gladly let her live in the great wilderness with us…especially now that we’re installing that wonder of wonders: fenceless fencing!
She would certainly give our neweest foundling, the energetic, yet nearly-deaf, thrownaway-by-uncaring-owners Marlee (as in Maitlin NOT Bob) someone to play with. Someone other than our two grandmotherly (NOT elderly) Alex and Sassy, that is.
By the way, HeyYou, Sassy says that she accepts your apology and that there are, in her words, “Woof..no hard feelings…arrh rooooo”. She says she knew you would eventually come to your senses and see the loving dog soul hidden underneath her allergen-laden curls.
What a wonderfully talented and smart team she and TheSon made at the dog show. It was a no-brainer from the moment they stepped into the show ring who the cutest dog/handler trophy would go to!! (Sassy’s already requesting a special diet and making plans for the next competition!) Thank you, Kibbles/Bits for such a lovely write up of the event.
You have the most adorable son (with really cute shoes!) and I’m so glad that you thought to take lots of pictures.
Sassy did a good job, but I’m sure that The Son helped sway the judges.
I’m so glad we have a camera to document all the things I miss when I’m at work.
Reminds me why I work so hard.