All the best things
I have assisted several new moms recently with some common breastfeeding difficulties. Something that I have heard numerous times of late is, “But it was so EASY for you and The Son.” Since apparently several of these new moms have been lurking here, I thought you might need a little story. NURSING HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN EASY FOR ME US! End of story. Just kidding, I will give you the slightly longer version.
My mom did not BF my brother or me. I have no friends who have breast fed very long at all (well, before I had The Son, I have lots now!). I do not have a sister, or cousin, or aunt to ask questions or reassure me. I knew when I was pregnant I wanted to BF The Son. I assumed it would be very hard because I had not seen anyone be successful. This scared me, so I sought out a BFing class at our local hospital. It was taught by a very old nurse who gave us stacks of pros on BFing, told us that the lactation consultant was there to help us after we gave birth. She showed us a mildly pornographic video produced in the seventies, and sent us on our way with the final thought, only 15% of us would make it to that CDC and AAP recommended minimum of a year. Yeah. Um, thanks.
I stocked up on nursing pads and lanolin, and refused to let any formula in the house before he was born, despite the cans already being sent by the chemical companies. I was stubborn; I refused to acknowledge the fact maybe I would not be able to BF. As my due date loomed near, and the ultrasounds showed The Son’s ginormous head growing bigger and bigger, I accepted the fact I would probably be having a c-section, and my resoluteness on BFing did waver slightly. On the day of my induction I told the nurses not to give him any pacifiers or formula under any circumstances.
He was born at 3:14 pm (Pi!)
and I was not able to hold him until about 6:30, I was still drugged, and the epidural was firmly in place. I sent all of my family, except for The Husband, away and asked for the lactation consultant to help with my first time BFing. “She is sick.” Um, whaaa? Sick LC was not written in my birth plan, not even the revised C-sec one. The nurse on duty showed me how to latch this sleeping little bundle on and left. L-E-F-T.
He actually did pretty well that first day, but by the next day all of the drugs had worn off and my poor nipples were a blistered, bleeding mess. The Son cried constantly, and my milk had yet to arrive. I was miserable, I was so conflicted, and confused and was thinking that we may be looking at formula after all. My stubbornness won out. I let my tiny baby starve, rejected any pacis, or bottles, and listened to him scream. Milk was still nowhere to be seen. His birth weight was falling rapidly. They released us four days later. No milk. Five days later. No milk! His lips were getting parched and I just knew that this supposed colostrum was not doing squat. He would suck and suck, and my nipples bled and bled, and we both cried and cried. Without a doubt the hardest, least fun or magical days of my life. The second day we were home I told the husband that if my milk was not in by that evening we were going to high tail it to Wal-Mart and buy some Similac. I took a nap and felt like such a failure, wondered if I would suck at all of motherhood as much as I did this. I fell asleep in tears, and could hear The Son crying in his Daddy’s arms.
When I woke up my milk had come in! Whether it had arrived on the last train from Clarksville, or the Mammary Fairy had visited in my sleep, I had huge, engorged, useful breasts. And The Son would not latch on! At all! All he wanted to do was sleep. And he weighed almost a full pound less than when he was born. I sent The Husband out to Wal-mart, at eleven, for one of those manual pumps to ease the unbearable pain. It was worse than my still throbbing c-section incision. I could not even figure out how to work the damn thing. I cried as I held my breast with both hands and The Husband held The Son and tried to coax his little mouth onto my nipple. We did this every two hours for a week before we all got the hang of nursing. His weight slowly but surely crept up. I had to wake us all up to nurse every two hours. A nursing session would last 45 minutes from start to finish, and then we would try to sleep for an hour and fifteen minutes. It sucked. There may be moms out there that tell you that those first few weeks are magical and wonderful and nursing only added to that. I was depressed, in pain, and weeping from exhaustion.
When The Son was about four weeks old my mom spent the night and I pumped enough with my new electric double barreled blessing from above to sleep for more than an hour at a time. I got two sections of four hours in a row. The Husband slept for nine hours straight. We all three woke up renewed. My nipples healed. The nursing continued, and got so much better, it did become magical and wondrous, a gift I felt I had earned.
There have been a few more bumps along the road, but overall, after that first month it was all easy coasting. So as I said, it was not easy for me, and it very well may not be easy for you, but it is worth it. Some people say that no one likes me on my soapbox, but you know what? This is my soapbox because I think if more people told the truth about the first days of motherhood we would have better breast feeding success rates, less postpartum depression, and happier, healthier babies. So, yes I do have a soapbox, but I paid my dues for it, just like all moms, BFing or FFing do. And I really believe all the best things in this life are the ones that you work for the hardest.
Filed under Breastfeeding, Soap box | Comments (5)Where I was a year ago today….
Where I spent today….
I was hit with a MeMe by ShoeShe!
Post your’s in the Comments!
( x) Gone on a blind date (And Married Him)
(x) Skipped school
( ) Watched someone die
( x) Been to Canada
( x) Been to Mexico
(x) Been to Florida
(x) Been on a plane
(x) Been lost
(half an x) Been on the opposite side of the country
(x ) Gone to Washington , DC
(x) Swam in the ocean
(x) Cried yourself to sleep (rarely)
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid for a meal with coins only
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t (too many times)
(x) Made prank phone calls ( I wish I could take some back)
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x) Danced in the rain
(x) Written a letter to Santa
(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(x) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about
(x) Blown bubbles
(X) Gone ice-skating
(x) Been skinny dipping outdoors
(x) Gone to the movies
1. Any nicknames? Hey You, Mama
2. Mother’s name: Grammy
3. Favorite drink? Sweet Tea (with sugar)
5. Body Piercings? Ears, one hole each (thanks mom)
6. How much do you love your job? My boss has a temper and the pay sucks, but it is the best job I have ever had!
7. Birthplace? Perfect town in the most made fun of state in the Union.
8. Favorite vacation spot? Ireland, Belgium, St. Simon’s Island, Santa Fe
9. Ever been to Africa ? No, but I will before I die
10. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? Duh, yes! Recently? For Breakfast yes, but not Dinner
11. Ever been on TV? Yes
12. Ever steal any traffic signs? No. I am a total goody-goody.
13. Ever been in a car accident? Yes, but not a serious one
14. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? 4 door Mommy Truck Mobile (but in my heart I drive a little blue Miata)
15. Favorite salad dressing? Raspberry Vinaigrette, Sesame Seed
16. Favorite pie? Ma’s Chocolate, and Key Lime in Key West
17. Favorite number? 10
18. Favorite movie? African Queen, Gone with the Wind, Sound of Music, Whale Rider
19. Favorite holiday? Christmas and Halloween
20. Favorite dessert? Chocolate Something, and Strawberry Shortcake
21. Favorite food? Japanese, Mexican, Italian and Southern (I pretty much just like to eat.)
22. Favorite day of the week? Sunday
23. Favorite brand of body wash? Johnson and Johnson sensitive skin baby wash
24. Favorite toothpaste? Crest Complete Control in Mint, Just recently switched back from Cinnamon, a pregnancy holdover.
25. Favorite smell? Honeysuckle, the Beach, clean baby shoulders.
26. What do you do to relax? Cuddle with my family, Read, Watch DVDs, Sleep (at least I try)
27. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Same town, new house, twelve year old kid, maaaaaaybe another one as well, on the couch with The Husband, watching happy news. Working part/full time at an unknown but fulfilling career.
28. Furthest place you will send this message? The whole internet
29. Who will respond to this the fastest? I don’t know. My Mom?
I should have known it was the crap book causing the problem.
I got lots of emails and a few comments yesterday telling me thehuckablog was broken! *gasp* NOOOO not my online-link-to-the-outside-world-baaaabee!!! Husband fix it! Yeah. He has been too busy so I just deleted the offending post. I will sum it up for you. The Book blew. (blowed? Blew just sounds weird.) Site all better. The End.
Filed under Read it or Rant | Comments OffFriday’s Read it or Rant: Mothering your nursing toddler
Mothering Your Nursing Toddler by Norma Jane Bumgarner
I very well may be the only one interested in this one, but ya know what? My Blog! I get to choose what to review, but it will be short. This is about Mothering! Mothering your toddler! Mothering your nursing toddler! Wow, that was a really good title for it, huh. It was pretty good, it did answer a few questions I had, such as why does The Son switch sides every thirty seconds? Answer, he likes a fast flow. Books like this are always good to read when you are having a bad nursing week, or feeling frustrated, or just in general wondering if you are a freak for still nursing. This book was a huge rah-rah yeah extended nursing, and to be honest…I like that. It may insult your intelligence sometimes, or Hey You may just know more about nursing than the average bear. There were a few things I did not care for, for example I really felt that it pushed reeeeaaaally extended nursing a little hard. Like if I do not nurse until he is four or five I quit too soon. Really? Wow, whatever. Also, it does not give much advice for nighttime non-co-sleeping nursing (my baby sleeps in his crib, in his room, with the door shut 87% of the time). This was a hard core AP parenting book (check out this for an intro to Attachment Parenting, so good it is on my favorites list.), so if you are not AP then this is not the book for you (and chances are you are not really nursing still anyway.)
The chapters on fathering the nursing toddler and marriage with a nursing toddler were excellent. This book really acknowledges how much of a family commitment breastfeeding is. I got this book out of our LLL book trunk, and it fits the LLL standards and beliefs perfectly, so a great read for my fellow LLLers. So in other words, if you plan on extended breastfeeding read this book BEFORE you have toddler so you know what to expect. If you disagree with Attachment Parenting and are Ferberizing your kids already, or formula feeding, then this is so not the book for you.
next up? Irresistible Forces by Danielle Steele.
Filed under Breastfeeding, Parenting for Dummies, Read it or Rant | Comments (2)Yackedy Yak: don’t talk back.
Things the Son has said this week:
“Foget tit ister” (forget it mister. In response to me asking him if he is ready for a nap)
“No! I wok.” (No, I walk. In response to me telling the husband to carry him because we are late.)
“Ouch! My knee!” (when he banged his knee….and again when he banged his hand.)
“Mama, need up.”
((Hey Ang, I know you are an Audiologist, but reaching back to your speech path days, How old when sentences are supposed to start?))
Huckablog Bonus!
The Son: A pictorial week in review.
Enjoyed the last of the Easter Peeps with Daddy.
Learned to take off his clothes, and diaper, during nap time.
Insisted on feeding himself his spaghettios.
Decided Baked Cheetohs taste like crud and must be fed to the dog. (and yes those are Christmas Jammies.)
Learned how to pedal three whole times in a row.
Spent a lot of time at the park.
Played Tiger and Zoo Keeper. (GRRRROWWWLL)
Went down the twisty slide about a zillion times.
All in All, a good week!
Filed under Parenting for Dummies, The Son | Comments (5)Toady McGuire
There is a new member of thehuckablog household!
The Son and I caught him at The In-Law’s house Tuesday night, and no worries, we are planning on letting him free in about a week and a half. In the mean time, does anyone know how to keep a toad alive? Should I like give him bugs and stuff? We are also open to any inspired name choices. The Son wants to name him Fog! Fog! I want to name him Toady McGuire. The Husband wants to name him “Whatever, you are handling this.”
Filed under Family-blame the DNA, Photography | Comments (15)