Comments are closed.
Hey You squared
February 25th, 2008
I met Hey You Richardson in January of 1999. As soon as we met, it was if we had not only known each other, but been best friends, for years. Even though we had more differences than things in common, we could talk non-stop and everything we did was a more fun than we could have with anyone else. We moved in together that summer after my old roommate stole my underwear. No, really, the girl stole my panties, but that is another post entitled Peppermint Patty. Anyway, I say Hey You squared because we shared the same first name and we spent so much time together that everyone called us the Hey Yous. I absolutely loved her (mind out of the gutters readers, in a purely heterosexual manner) and she was the best friend I ever had. I will always be grateful for those years in college when we were so close.
Here is irony for you, I never would have met my husband if it were not for her (we were introduced by her mutual friend)…and she absolutely, with a passion, hated every fiber of his being. The Husband and I met the summer before my senior year in college. He was just supposed to be a summer fling…..but I got flung head over heels instead. I will never forget one night in the late fall that she was sitting on the edge of my bed in our apartment; The Husband (then The Boyfriend) called and I ended our brief conversation with “I love you.” She looked at me with tears in her huge blue eyes and said “Why, would you tell him that?”, and she was so upset when I answered, “Because it is true.”
I never fully understood why she disliked him. He had nothing against her, and was always perfectly pleasant to her. Maybe sadness because it was the end of our carefree college days? Anyway, I never consciously chose The Husband over her. I never wanted to discard our friendship because it truly was special to me. But….seven years later, I am still married to The Husband, and have not talked to her in years. Why am I writing about this in such a public way? Because I started this blog as therapy, and this has bothered me for years. And, I thought I might email her a link….what is the worst that could happen? One more hit for my site?
She is married now herself, and has a great career, and I am very proud of her. But she was wrong about The Husband. God meant for the two of us to be together. He is my ying, my anchor, my (forgive the cheese) soul mate. He makes me want to be a better person, makes my knees melt when he kisses me…even if it is the seven trillionth time. I could never, ever, ask for a better husband or father for my son.
I wish she could have seen that when we were still friends, because in a lot of weird ways…they have more in common with each other than I do with either one of them.
Readers: feel free to be keyboard psychiatrists. What do you think about this sad little tale?
Filed under Friends-All three of them, The Husband, lexapro lexplains it |7 Responses to “Hey You squared”
I guess the theory I had back then has been thrown out the window now… I think you are right when you say it had to do with her not wanting to grow up. Truly falling in love means having to make a commitment and everything that comes with that is very adult. You were going somewhere she couldn’t follow and that scared her. I know you didn’t really make a choice, but even so you made the right one. I couldn’t imagine a better husband for you.
thanks, it means a lot to hear others say that…..I am sad she has not replied.
Miss you guys. Still on for Monday?
Yes, we are still on for Monday. I will call when we have a time.
Tell you friend ShoeShe I am hurt by the cuter discussion
I sent her the link again and it bounced back…..maybe she never got the link? Who has her facebook info? You should give her link.
This was a truly good friend, that apparently was having some issues about your school years coming to an end, and everything she knew changing. She is a sincerely sweet person, and I pray one day the chasm will be crossed to bring your great friendship back into harmony again now that you each have settled into true adulthood.
You are right, hey you, the qualities that made her such a special person are the same qualities we all love about thehusband. Both are wonderful, kind people.
I’ve debated over whether or not I should reply to this post. Seeing as I was stuck in the middle, I knew more about this situation than anyone would ever care to know. It was sad for me as well, to see two very wonderful people whom I dearly loved grow apart (not to mention, while I was sharing an apt. with them both). And I partly feel responsible since Hey You asked me if my (then fiancee) had any guy friends who were available. At the same time, my (current husband)’s friend was asking him if I had any girl friends who were available. It was meant to be, you know? I wondered at first if they would be compatible (especially after the very salty “Italian” chicken fiasco), but when it became obvious that The Husband was treating Hey You exactly like the princess that we all know she was, I knew it was right. That being said, it still wasn’t easy at times.
My memories of my undergraduate years will always include Hey You Squared. We had a lot of fun together, going to the Eagles lodge for karaoke, eating hot wings when the other Hey You got her braces off, and Thursdays with Friends. Geez, I hadn’t thought about this stuff for awhile. The last time I saw either one of them was around Christmas 2006, when my husband and I went to visit Hey You and The Husband and to meet The Son. It was a great visit. The very next day, the other Hey You was at the grocery store, and totally surprised me. I hadn’t talked to her in years, and she was totally sweet.
I’m hoping that things will work themselves out (I’ve been hoping this for over 5 years). It would be nice to have coffee with them again at Joe Muggs and talk and flip through magazines like we did back in undergrad…I realize that this is probably just a dream that will never come to fruition. I will have to satisfy it with the fond memories I have from those years back in undergrad.
Hey You, you have a wonderful husband and a beautiful son. You deserve to be happy, and he has made you happy. I know that you didn’t really choose him over her, it just worked out that way. God has a plan for all of us, and his plan included you and The Husband being together.
thanks Ang. Words can not express how much it means to read that. You were definitely acting as part of God’s plan.